They Say “Adulthood na SCAM”

For some time now, when I get to talk with some of my friends and ask them how they are doing, they’d say “I just dey” Nothing ‘fun’ happening. Everyone’s trying to get their footing in the adult space. After all, we are newbies (new babies). Some of us are falling and standing right back up. Some are toddling along, barely keeping vertical.

And it’s very easy, at this point, to lose touch with each other. We’re all thin-eyed, scrunched-faced focused on making it; on finding our space on the adult terrain we’ve just found ourselves on.

We get, very easily, frustrated, depressed when despite our valiant efforts we stumble on some unexpected obstacle and fall.

My thoughts on all these are:

WE NEED GOD: If God doesn’t build the house, the builders only build shacks, if God doesn’t guard the city, the night watchman might as well take a nap {Psalm 127:1 MSG). We need God’s help and support. After all, the life we’re living is his gift to us. He knows life better than we do.

WE NEED EACH OTHER: By yourself, you’re unprotected. With a friend, you can face the worst. Can you round up a third? A three-stranded rope isn’t easily snapped {Ecclesiastes 4:12 MSG}. We need to be there for each other. We need to form a meaningful network of friends; friends we can trust. No point being friends with someone you cannot trust. I, personally, believe strongly that trust is a key component for any meaningful friendship.

WE NEED TO BE PATIENCE: So let’s not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time, we will harvest a good crop if we don’t give up, or quit. {Galatians 6:9}We need to patiently wait for the seeds of our genuine efforts towards growth and establishment to germinate. It honestly doesn’t happen in a day. We really do need patience.

Cheers to having God, having the support of each other, and being patient. We’ll get there.

I SHOT MYSELF IN THE LEG

Note to self: Don’t! Please don’t shoot yourself in the leg again. Don’t do yourself the injustice of not fully utilizing all your gifts, all the amazing deposits in your person; the injustice of not even learning more about yourself; of not stretching the limits of your ability.

For a while now, I’ve had this feeling that I have been doing myself a gross injustice by letting my gifts lie fallow. And I literally feel the pain of my doing so; the pain of having shot myself in the leg. I had a thought today while removing the rubber band used to hold a large piece of stock-fish. Ha ha ha ha ha. Yes, stock-fish. I was in the kitchen cooking. So, as I unwound the rubber band, it went from being large enough to hold the large piece stock-fish to being just large enough to go round my wrist. Someone who doesn’t know the capacity of a rubber band would think that, in its original state, it wouldn’t do more than go around a medium sized wrist. But it, in actual fact, can do more. But only when it is stretched.

What did I learn from this? I have to stretch myself!!! What translates as stretching for me? For me, stretching translates as working on improving on my gifts and abilities even when I don’t feel like: writing that story even when I don’t feel like, reading that book even when I don’t feel like, going for choir rehearsals even when I don’t feel like, studying the bible and praying even when I don’t feel like it. Doing what’s necessary for growth and improvement even when I don’t feel like it! I came across these words of Pearl S. Buck “I don’t wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to work” Thank God for these words. It’s made me realize that one of the greatest disservice to myself is waiting till I’m in the mood to do something before I do it. OH GOD!  Not anymore!! I’ll put up a blog post even when I don’t feel like. I hope you’ll do what you know you have to do even when you don’t feel like. It really does payoff.

But wait. It’s hard work oh. I hope you’re ready. I hope I’m ready. Okay then. Let’s ride!!

 

 

PROVERBS 14 vs 23 The Message Bible (MSG)

Hard work always pays off;
mere talk puts no bread on the table.

ESCAPED: A Short Story

This is a short story I believe was inspired by the holy spirit. I didn’t start out with any plan to write this but God knows what’s he’s doing. A beautiful thing about him as our Father is his ever readiness to pull us out of whatever temptation that we may find ourselves in. I really do hope this is a refreshing read.

ESCAPED

He had her fooled. You could tell. It was there in the phony excesses of his gestures, in the saccharine sweetness of his words. But coming from a home where she hadn’t known love, she couldn’t tell the difference.

“Baby” He whispered. His hands leisurely exploring her skin. First the small of her back, then gliding to her hips, her thighs. Her body spiked warm. She was fast getting sucked in, eyes drowsily closed, her breath coming in short gasps. Her vow to stay chaste till marriage quarter out the window. A thug of emotions clouding her mind: give in, don’t give in, remember whose you are!!!  Her body her greatest betrayal. Her back comes in contact with bed. She feels his weight on her, his knees spreading her thighs apart.

Her eyes pop open and she looks around. She sees the beige walls of the hotel room, beautiful art works hanging at different angles, his mouth trailing kisses on her neck. Her eyes get stuck on one art work in particular, a face. She recognized the face. Bloodied. Tear-streaked. Soulful. Full of love. Her Lord!

She feels his weight lift and turns to look at him.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his tone a tight rope between irritation and patience.

She looked at him. Really looked at him, at his face and her tears flowed.

He didn’t love her. She could see it deep in his eyes. She could feel it. She knew love. She had just seen him. She’s seen love flowing from him to her and had felt it too. She turns to look at the art work again and doesn’t find it there anymore. Shivers ripple through her.

“What’s wrong?” He asked again. This time clearly irritated.

She stood. Picked up her clothes, quietly got dressed and left.

 

Psalm 124 vs  7

We’ve flown free from their fangs, free of their traps, free as a bird. Their grip is broken; we’re free as a bird in flight

Tired?

Wow! I cant believe my last post was on November 20th last year. I’m sorry I’ve been AWOL.

I’m back now! and what better topic to make my come back with than this one.

So here it is…………I’M TIRED.

I’m tired ’cause things are not moving at the pace I’d want them to. I’m tired ’cause I face and try to deal with certain challenges daily and sometimes I succeed, most times I dont.

While tired, however, I ask myself  “What do I do now?” I am very careful in answering this question ’cause it comes a long way in determining my reaction to my state of tiredness.

It’s very easy, trust me, to throw myself a pity party and gripe about how everything’s not working as fast or as smoothly as I’d want, how I think I’m the only one who has it this bad..blah blah blah..  But I vehemently refuse to start off or continue in that line of thinking.

Here’s what I choose to do. I stand back from all situations causing me stress. I become far removed from them. In a way, I stop thinking too seriously about them. Dont get me wrong, most are important and their importance is even what gets me stressed about them in the first place. Thinking about King Solomon’s speech about all in life being vain helps me become far removed from all “important” but stressful situations in my life.

When I do this, I see other beautiful things that are working well for me; the fact that I have GOD, life, food to eat, clothes to wear, a home I live in,the love and support of friends and family, a smart phone!. Lol.  I think of the fact that some others have it worst than I do and then  I am grateful, grateful to God and as a consequence, I receive a boost to give life and all it’s “important situations” yet another trial. I decide to trust God again.

 

Look at the birds. They dont plant, harvest, or save food in barns, but your heavenly Father feeds them. Dont you know that you are worth more than they are? You cannot add any time to your life by worrying about it    MATTHEW 6 VS 26-27

 

Giving. Brrrrrb

HELLO. So, I’ve been thinking about the subject of giving for a while now and I’m not talking about giving offerings in church. I’m talking about JUST GIVING, whether to beggers on the street or to your neigbour or even to siblings.

I’ve also been very curious about the attitude of young people towards GIVING. Do young people really give and when we do, do we do it generously? To me, it seems we are always looking to receive but not so eager to give. What do you think?

Generally, there’s this phobia for giving to strangers on the streets who beg for help.While this isnt really unfounded, it is, however, crippling. It cripples one’s desire to give when you hear tales from north, east, west and south of people who gave to beggers and got turned into animals or whose money was used for rituals. I mean, YIKES!!!!! Nawa oh!!yikes-emoji

Buh really, should we allow ourselves fail to build a habit of giving because we fear. Personally, I will not allow myself be moved by fear concerning whether or not to give. This doesnt mean, however, that I dont think twice about giving my money to that old woman who has just asked for help. Lol. To be honest, I prefer buying stuffs for people who ask for alms to giving them currency. I’m just trying to create a balance here. I mean, let’s be honest, we are Africans. In Africa. As much as I dont want to be supersticious, I AM. Lol. This brings me to another aspect of giving I am imploring young people, young christians especially, to strongly invest in- giving is an investment. If you dont feel comfortable giving cash, you can give your money’s worth. Buy and give out clothes, shoes, provide food, build boreholes. Do something. I’m honestly looking forward to a future where today’s young people will be heavily invested in giving back to their communities. I’m looking forward to a future time where because of the generous contributions of today’s young people who will selflessly think of others-it’s not easy sha (LOL)- the less privileged will live very comfortable lives. We’d have to be careful not to encourage laziness though.

I’m a transformational giver. When I give, lives will be transformed. This is my confession. One day, I’ll fully represent this reality. Will it be the same for you?

2nd Corinthians 9 vs 7 NIV

Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

CHASE THOSE OPPORTUNITIES DOWN!!!! DONT LET THEM PASS YOU BY!!

So, after realizing that I need to grow into my imagined future reality to dispel current feelings of dissatisfaction resulting from disparities between my current state and my imagined future reality , I ask myself this question “How do I grow?”

I realize that room for growth comes in the place of opportunities. To effect growth, we have to chase down and take advantage of opportunities for growth. For instance, you work in a media house as an errand girl or guy but have grand dreams of one day going on air. Your dream, however does not relate with your present job description or skill set even. And then, an opportunity comes up; the media house is offering a free three month training for five applicants who pass a rigorous screening and these five applicants, after their training, will be offered jobs as On Air hosts in the media house. Remember, your dream is to become an On Air personality and you have to grow into that dream. Imagine how close you’ll be to growing into that dream if you chase down this opportunity by doing all you can to avail yourself of it: learning all you can to pass the rigorous screening. Very close. You will have achieved your dream if you are among the five chosen. An opportunity for growth may even be that friend of yours who has promised to teach you the basics of coding. Just maybe you have had dreams of being an expert at coding. It may even be a full scholarship to study abroad; you’ve nurtured dreams of studying abroad but always known that your parents’ income can’t sufficiently finance your education abroad. Heck!, it may be that your best friend is a cousin to that bae you’ve liked for a while now. Guy!!, an opportunity has presented itself for you to find out what makes her tick. This way, you groom yourself on how you’ll present your case. Lol. Or babes maybe your Aunt just got you really georgeous outfits from the UK. It’s time to SLAY!! All na to get that guy attention na. Chai!! Lol

One very vital thing about opportunities is that, they do not always search you out. Sometimes it appears as if they are handed to you without you searching, but not always. You have to be on the look out for them; be on the look out for courses you can take that’ll help in sharpening your skill set in your chosen career. be on the look out for internship opportunities in companies you’d want to work (this gives you room for growth and also places you within the environment where you can display the achieved effects of growth), be on the look out for things that will challenge you; those are opportunities for growth too. Do not shy away from an invitation to speak in an event when you have always had dreams of speaking to a crowd at events. You may be afraid and unsure, but take it up and then learn and practice as much as you can to give an excellent speech. By doing this, you’ve grown!! Imagine what happens if you dont chase down the opportunity. There’s no growth. No achievment of your dreams.

This is as much an advice to myself as it is to anyone who reads this. Babe!!!, Dude!!! chase down relevant opportunities and take advantage of them. Only then can you grow. Do no allow relevant opportunities pass you by. No matter how seemingly insignificant they are. Opportunities come in different packages. Be on the look out for them. I will be on the look out too oh.

p.s It’s also helpful to tell family and friends the kind of opportunities you are on the look out for.

Proverbs 1 vs 5 NIV

let the wise listen and add to their learning and let the discerning get guidance.

Hey!! Are you dissatisfied?

Hey Jesus freaks. (Smiles) How y’all doing? I’ve been MIA. I’m sorry I haven’t been consistent in my postings. I will do a better job of it. So, I got to change the blog’s address and title, in the spirit of change. Lol. I do hope you find the changes refreshing. If not, please do leave a comment. It will be taken seriously. (smiles)

So I recently concluded my NYSC year. Yay!!!. Trust me, it comes with a lot of uncertainties, a lot of questions; some answered, some unanswered, and then, with a whole truckload of feelings. One feeling that assails me most, I think, is the feeling of dissatisfaction. I have this picture in my head of where I want to get to, who I want to be but somehow, my present reality does not even remotely resemble this picture ( obviously; my point exactly). I’m dissatisfied with who I am where I am, what I have, what I can do. They do not measure up with my dream destination.

In a strange twist, I am glad that I have this feeling. It eventually becomes a driving force; driving me to pursue and attain whatever I need to be able to measure up to that future reality I have painted a picture of. In other words, I grow into that future reality I imagine. Say for instance I dream of dining with presidents some day but find that I dont know how to dine in higly formal settings; how to hold a spoon, which spoon to use for which meal, which glass to use for which wine and so on, what I’ll do is grow in that regards; learn how to dine in formal situation. Or maybe you dream of having this superb relationship with this gurl you been eyeing but find out you’re tongue-tied whenever you’re near her. You’ll have to grow out of that state and into a more vocal and confident one whenever you’re around her, so you can clearly covey your feelings and start a great relationship with her. Lol

Growth involves learning, be it in a class room or outside a classroom. Growth for me cures the feeling of dissatisfaction. If you want to earn a million naira in a month, grow into the kind of person who can earn such amounts in a month. By learning what to do to earn that much and doing them, you’ve grown.

Jesus freaks!!!, We’ve got some growing; learning to do in honour of our Lord Jesus. The world’s watching, earnestly anticipating our manifestation.

1 Timothy 4 vs 15

Cultivate these things. Immerse yourself in them. The people will all see you mature right before their eyes!

 

 

 

 

Old Age, Now that you’re young.

I look around now, when my youth gets to my head; when I’m strong and in perfect health, the strength of youth zinging through my pores, and I see the elderly around me. Then I imagine. I imagine the state I’d be in when I’m their age: physical, mental and even spiritual state. I must confess that I, especially, imagine how I would look when I’m their age; how my face would look like;would I be a pretty old lady. Call me petty. Lol.

And then I wonder. I wonder whether or not I’d want my children and grand-children around me when I’m old; whether or not my children and grand-children will even have time for their old and frail granny

Then, I come to conclusions. I come to conclusions about what I would want and wouldn’t want at that age. I wouldn’t want to be neglected at that age, neither would I want to be an inconvenience. I’d want to be loved, treasured, cherished, treated with care and respect (despite any eccentricities).

Now that I’m young, when I think of old age, I simply think of working so hard that I’m comfortable and happy in my old age. I think of financial independence at that age. I think of comfort and the joy of having loved ones around me. What consumes your thoughts when you think of old age now that you are young?

p.s. Plz guys, ladies, I would like to implore us to treat with care and respect any and all aged persons we come across on a daily basis. We do not necessarily have to be related to them to be of help to them. Neither do we allow superstition and fear keep us from lendering our assistance to them..You’ll feel the better for it and God definitely will reward your generousity.

Leviticus 19 vs 32 MSG

“Show respect to the aged; honor the presence of an elder; fear your God. I am God.

Cheers to a daily faith living of care and and respect for the aged in our communities

When is it time to trust in God?

One wonders. As young people we sometimes feel on top of the world, like we can conquer whatever comes our way. We feel indomitable ’cause we have age and time on our sides (for the time at least) and so very easily, we tend to rely on our strengths: the stuffs we can do, our talents and skills, our above average IQ or roof-hitting IQ ( for the gurus out there; I hail oh. Lol ), the books we have read, the people  we know up there. We fail to to take our desires and plans before God, the one who made us and without whom we are nothing and have nothing; really, there is nothing we have that wasn’t given to us to by God. Can I get an Amen?!

So, we do not trust in Him (God) and then, BAM!!!, we are struck with the feeling of helplessness when we hit a fork in the road: when that oga @ the top we were expecting to help make getting that job a sure thing forgets we even asked for his help: “Ahhh…I forgot oh..and the vacancy has been filled. Mtcheww…ahhh..You should have reminded me ( and you did oh, countless times)”, when we meet people who can do that thing we’ve always prided ourselves in knowing how to do and even do it better. Then, we begin to think of trusting in God ’cause we realize , at that point, that we cant make it on our own and, thus, need His help.

I do not want to be a young christian who only trusts in God when I hit a fork in th road. I want to be a young christian who trusts in God even when I feel like I’ve got it all covered; when I feel cocky like Tyrion Lannister ( the dwarf ) in Game of Thrones. Lol. The guy’s so cocky; A Lannister always pays his debt. Humph. Lol.

When I trust in God, even when I feel confident in my abilities, I dont get floored when feelings of inadequacy strike: when I meet that competition that has everything I dont and jara or even when I dont get called for an interview after sending a CV I took hours creating. I simply hold on strongly to my anchor, God ’cause I started out trusting in Him.

Proverbs 3 vs 5-6 MSG

Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
    don’t try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
    he’s the one who will keep you on track.

Cheers to a daily faith living of enduring trust in God..

 

 

Help!!! I’m young and I have challenges!!!

Do I really?

Yup. Remember those times in school when a subject seem(ed) too tough to crack?; that time when a final year thesis had to be written and a deadline set. Goodness! That was a really tough time for me.Infact, the entire ordeal of getting a Bachelors degree is full of challenges. It doesn’t end there. Ask the elderly people around you and you’ll get an affirmative. As we advance in age, so do our challenges. Last year, I was faced with the challenge of writing a B.A thesis before a set deadline and graduating school at the pre-determined time (2016). My challenges are different now; the challenge of starting a dream career (after the NYSC year) and prospering at it, the challenge of living a fufilling life.EVERY STAGE OF LIFE’S FULL OF CHALLENGES. Heck! guys, even getting that cute lady you’ve been eyeing is a challenge. Ladies, dont even get me started on what we go through to catch that bloke’s attention. If these aren’t challenges, I dont know what is. Lol. This is on a lighter note.

Since challenges are inevitable, what do we do?

Too many times we pray for ease, but that’s a prayer seldom met. What we need to do is pray for more roots that can reach deep into the eternal (God) so when the rains fall and the windblows, we wont be swept asunder” Philip Gulley Chicken Soup for The Unsinkable Soul..

Face them (challenges) head on with our feet firmly rooted in Christ. DO NOT cower in a corner or shrink from the challenges in helplessness. Walk up to that bae and tell her you like her. Dont be scared you wont have what to say. Lol. Seriously though, we have to learn to face our challenges head on while drawing our strength from God…When working on my B.A thesis, although I was almost always bombarded with scary thoughts of not meeting up with the deadline and not graduating with my colleagues, I chose to ignore the thoughts and draw strength from God’s promises in his word and I worked on the project. Facing your challenge is doggedly pursuing that thing that seems difficult. The payoffs in the end are amazing.

So…in facing my present challenges, I’ll send out my CV to companies I’d love to work for, take courses, get a masters degree, work on myself. I’ll DO what is necessary to begin the career of my dreams..or maybe even birth that business idea I’ve had for a while.

What would you do?

BE DOGGED IN YOUR DETERMINATION TO FACE HEAD-ON AND CONQUER YOUR PRESENT CHALLENGES, DRAWING STRENGH FROM GOD……OH, I ALMOST FORGOT THIS…DONT YOU EVER QUIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Psalm 31 vs 3a

Yes, You are my Rock and my Fortress…”

Cheers to a daily faith living where we conquer our challenges with God on our sides.